MANDALA
With a whispering glimmer of hope. All alone at the end of the rope – lost. Where I belong and everyone can easily unsee me. But I am alive. Where the wind whistles like rusted chains and the crying of wisdom remains – unheard. Pulling me down. Taking away my will to not just survive. Cause I am alive, alive, alive, as long as I’m breathing. Where the one thing we share is a place. A place full of life, full of ways to shape. How to go on. Where to belong. The choice is right in front of me. So listen to me. Om tum tulasaye namaha.
If a mountain could move we’d get smashed by its feet. The end of all we build up in a hundred years. If a glacier could cry we would drown in its tears. The cycle of life. Dead end´s coming near. How can we be a part of the miracle? How, if we´re not more than physical? Now the disbelief brings us to our knees. Down on our knees. How long can we ignore? How long to settle old scores? The warning signs are shouted down till there´s nothing left to restore. If the ocean could moan we´d get crushed by its waves. Beyond two degrees we choke from the air we breathe. How can we be part of the miracle? How, if we don´t break the cycle? Not the center of the world that´s spinning around us. A part of the cycle that´s spinning without us.
Send me to an early grave. When we´re reaching the crest right after leaving our nest. From where we come to where we go. When the air is getting thin we see the darkness within. Why´s growth the meaning of our lives and the root of all crisis at the same time? Flying higher than heaven. Bury myself alive and arise. Another nail in the coffin. I tempt my fate. Send me to an early grave. So we reach for the stars. Trophies covering the scars. We´re running into our own demise. Don´t tell me you´re afraid of heights. When dreams learn to fly. Don´t be afraid of the fall. With every step that I take. From the cradle to the grave. The first step could be the last mistake. Learn to walk to learn to run. Learn to fly to learn to fall. The last step will be the first regret. Learn to live to learn to die. Seeing death to feel alive.
Live an existence in abstinence. Giving a shameless play to the innocent. A humble life locked in chastity – tear down the walls of humanity. To cover the sight like a god given right. This is holy war. This is holy war. This is holy war. Throw them down into the flames. To cover yourself with a veil cannot be the creators will. Giving the choiceless a choice, the voiceless a voice. Giving the chanceless a chance, the changeless a change. Reveal the mistakes. Uncover the snakes. Until all skins will be shed. God is dead.
. . . – – – . . . This place is abandoned. I hold on to you. Don´t know where we landed. I´ve got faith in you. Walking on the edge. Not knowing every step could be the last. I hold on to you. This path seems so lonely, you´ve been here before. No footsteps behind me. Ascending to where life and death collide. I hope to see you on the other side. So let me hear you scream from the top of the world to find my way back home. Let me hear you scream from the depth of despair to save our souls. Let me hear you scream from the top of your lungs to know that you still care. Let me hear you scream cause I miss you. I miss you. Now I hear the whispers like cries in the wind while I burst into shivers. Should I go further? Am I scared? No, in your footsteps I am not afraid. I hear the whispers in the wind of letting go and giving in to the cold and lay down to rest. I hear the whispers in the wind. Enfold like a warm embrace I know I´m not alone but to scared to face.
Guide me into misery and ask me to stay. I’ll never go away. Lead me into weightlessness and beg me to say that I’m your gravity. Tell me how should I find you when you´re lost, when you´re trying to find your way and my feet are still seeking foothold. Guide me to the ecstasy and take it away, day by day by day. Lead me into hopelessness, making me pray that you’re my remedy. Tell me how should I hold you when I’m floating and hoping to reach the ground. Drifting out of balance. Guide me into misery and ask me to stay. Now you´re so far away. Bring me back from weightlessness I beg you to say that you´re my gravity. Tell me how should I lose you when I’m lost, when I’m trying to find my way to overcome the distance. And all the memories that are fading were washed away by the rain and echoes from forgotten times from here until the afterlife.
DIVINE TRAGEDY
Sick and tied to remedy
Falling into misery
We’re nothing but our own disease
Crying for recovery
Causing the catastrophe
We’re nothing but our own disease
We came like light to the flies, like leeches bleeding us dry
By heading for better days, we made the same mistakes
We keep on waiting, keep on waiting, so alone and afraid
And like a bird in its cage, we bite the feeding hand
Who are we to draw the line of who will live and who shall die
We’re nothing but the disease
Our last words, an outcry
An act of God we can’t defy
So far from perfection, are we the infection? We are!
We are the plague
So we are thrown to the wolves and like a murder of crows
That hears the crying for help, we’re waiting for the end
We keep on failing, keep on failing, so alone and afraid
And like a shark in its tank, we bite the feeding hand
Our last words, an outcry
An act of God we can’t defy
So far from perfection, are we the infection? We are!
We are the plague
Who are we to draw the line of who will live and who shall die
So far from perfection, we are the infection
Hear our last words, an outcry
Sick and tied to remedy
Falling into misery
We’re nothing but our own disease
Crying for recovery
Causing the catastrophe
We’re nothing but our own disease
Our last words, an outcry
An act of God we can’t defy
So far from perfection, are we the infection? We are!
We are the plague
Our last words, an outcry
So far from perfection, we are the infection
Hear our last words, an outcry
Thrown away
The sketch of yesterday
The outlines shine through the cover
Like cruel reality
But I’m fine
Been there a dozen times
Just need another clover
Hope’s the last to die
And so I wait
I’ve seen a thousand falling stars
Following every rainbow to where it starts
And every penny I had that could help to dispel
Lies at the ground of a wishing well
Painter
Draw yourself a stranger
And every single line
Leads to the one that you design
Until yourself is covered
I can’t hide
I thought we’re different now I know I was blind
The day will come I see your face in the mirror
And realize we’re one of a kind
I cannot escape
My future’s my fate
Painter
Draw yourself a stranger
And every single line
Leads to the one that you design
Until yourself is covered
Painter
Draw yourself a stranger
And every single line
Leads to the one that you design
Until yourself is covered
I’ve seen a thousand falling stars
Following every rainbow to where it starts
And every penny I had that could help to dispel
Lies at the ground of a wishing well
But I’m fine
Been there a dozen times
Just need another clover
Hope’s the last to die
Hope’s the last to die
To die
Painter
Draw yourself a stranger
And every single line
Leads to the one that you design
Until yourself is covered
The harder I pull the tighter it gets
The quicksand I live in is filling my chest
The higher I fly the harder I fall
The devil’s the only one catching my soul
This is a race to the bottom
I’m sinking
The more I resist the stronger the chains
I want the fire back in my veins
You who enter here
Abandon all hope
I want to live in the chaos, in the fire
Shatter every piece of me
Just want to feel anything to fill the void in me
I want to live in the chaos, in the fire
I was blind now I can see
Gazing into the abyss as it’s gazing into me
The closer I come the further you run
It’s moving, removing, until it is gone
The deeper I dive the darker it gets
The water caressing me is taking my breath
Welcome to paradise
A better place where I’m not under pressure
Where I’m not justified
Where nothing matters and the pain is gone
I want to live in the chaos, in the fire
Shatter every piece of me
Just want to feel anything to fill the void in me
I want to live in the chaos, in the fire
I was blind now I can see
Gazing into the abyss as it’s gazing into me
Harder, tighter, stronger, higher, deeper, darker, I resist
I feel the pressure
I’m moving on
To higher pleasure
The pain is gone
I want to live in the chaos, in the fire
I was blind now I can see
Gazing into the abyss as it’s gazing into me
If you don’t know where god is
Don’t preach to me, my dear
This is my own revelation
Where do you want to go?
You’re far from average
Average as you need to be
Far away
From what you’re expected
Expected to be ordinary
Like a bird in the sea
Like a fish in the trees
Like a circle won’t fit the square
A prisoner at large
Like a clover among grass
Like a diamond among glass
We stand alone
If you don’t know where god is
Don’t preach to me, my dear
And so I remain the outcast
My heart it brought me here
And every single crossroad
Leads to a thousand ways
This is my own revelation
Like a clover among grass
Like a diamond among glass
We stand alone
No one knows the path you’re on
And only time will tell
Whose footsteps you are following
And let you bid farewell
The maze that lies in front of you
Is not a dead end road
It’s endings show diversity
It‘s your choice which unfolds
If you don’t know where god is
Don’t preach to me, my dear
And so I remain the outcast
My heart it brought me here
And every single crossroad
Leads to a thousand ways
This is my own revelation
No one knows the path you’re on
And only time will tell
Whose footsteps you are following
And let you bid farewell
The maze that lies in front of you
Is not a dead end road
It’s endings show diversity
It’s your choice which unfolds
We stand alone
Get me out, get it in
Feel my eyes growing dim
Colors fading
It begins, it begins
To take hold from within
Captivating
It’s taking over me
Feels like it’s controlling me
Running away from the pictures that I don’t want to see
Breathing out, breathing in
Feel the smoke on my skin
Covering me
Anything, anything
To forget about the sins
Bothering me
It’s taking over me
Feels like it’s controlling me
Running away from the feelings that I don’t want to feel
Giving up, giving in
The concluding hymn
Calling me
Falling in, falling in
Not a safety pin
Binding me
It’s taking over me
Feels like it’s controlling me
Running away from the person that I don’t want to be
That’s where I hide, broken inside
But safe from the chaos that’s raging outside
Afraid of the fall, when light breaks the dawn
Reality haunts me, relapse into clarity
Take me away
No, no, no one hears my pray
Help me delirium
Save me from
I’m in a dream
No, no, none of this is real
I’m in delirium
Save me from me
It’s not a dream
It’s a nightmare
Come get me out, come get me in
I can’t remember but I can’t forget
I’m caught in between those two worlds that distract me
Zuhause warten, weil die Wände so schön dick sind
Im Rausch baden
Bis mir die Decke das Genick bricht
Ich muss raus hier, doch trau mich nicht mehr vor die Haustür
Es ist aus und einatmen und den Rauch auf meiner Haut spüren
Die Blase um mich rum ist so zerbrechlich
Doch wenn die Welt hier drin nicht echt ist, ist sie es da draußen erst recht nicht
Sing die Angst in den Schlaf und
Träume mich ins Delir
Bis ich geh und es dann wenigstens den Teufel interessiert
I’m in a dream
No, no, none of this is real
I’m in delirium
Save me from
From me
Take me away from me
Take me away
No, no, no one hears my pray
Help me delirium
Save me from
I’m in a dream
No, no, none of this is real
I’m in delirium
Save me from me
Forlorn places, different ages
Changes overdue
Unknown faces, forgone chances
Thoughts that once were new
Repeat
Feels like a déjà-vu, all that we’ve been through
Preying to the bone, rebuilt it stone by stone
Keeping our own track, our shadows lie ahead
Our traces left behind
We’re moving on
Into the unknown on trails foregone
Into our new old life
On different ways the same mistakes
We’re holding on
New surroundings, same old stories
Feels like coming home
Stranger voices, well-known choices
And still, we’re all alone
Anywhere
Even if the wind has changed
The stagnant air remains
The air I need to breath
We’re moving on
Into the unknown on trails foregone
Into our new old life
On different ways the same mistakes
We’re holding on
Where do we go from here
We never know, never know
There’s no turning back
Nevermore, nevermore
Oh I’m coming home
We’re moving on
Into the unknown on trails foregone
Into our new old life
On different ways the same mistakes
We’re holding on
Reminded to our mortality
Day by day
Listening to the litany
We obey
Roaming around for a lifetime
In a desperate search for a lifeline
The meaning no one can fathom
Unaware, unaware
Can we face the mistakes
When the masquerade fades
We don’t dare to
To ask and get what we deserve
When the curtain reveals
What the drama conceals
It has turned to a tragedy, a tragedy
We’re the ones to blame and the sufferers
And as we thrive and as we prosper
We are blind
A better place, a spot of bother
Left behind
Roaming around for a lifetime
In a desperate search for a lifeline
The meaning no one can fathom
Unaware, unaware
Can we face the mistakes
When the masquerade fades
We don’t dare to
To ask and get what we deserve
When the curtain reveals
What the drama conceals
It has turned to a tragedy, a tragedy
We’re the ones to blame and the sufferers
The wind caused us to fall
We lost the breath of life
Not formed to live like animals
For we’re not born to fly
We lost the strength divine
Wasting our mortal lives
We found ourselves within the dark
To move the sun and stars
Can we face the mistakes
When the masquerade fades
We don’t dare to
To ask and get what we deserve
Can we face the mistakes
When the masquerade fades
We don’t dare to
To ask and get what we deserve
When the curtain reveals
What the drama conceals
It has turned to a tragedy, a tragedy
Tragedy, tragedy
Believer
Why don’t you see me
Believer
Why don’t you hear me
Believer
You only see yourself
Theorist, terrorist
Are you afraid of falling off the edge of the world
Of vaccination, radiance and being overheard
Are you afraid of everything you can’t conceive
Everything that’s over your head
Theorist, terrorist
Are you afraid of chemical trails up in the sky
Of an uncomfortable truth just becoming a lie
Do you really think that you’re the one who has seen the
You’re not the one who has seen the light
Liberate yourself
Into another cage
You don’t believe what you can’t see
Through the veil of conspiracy
Non-Believer
You don’t want to see the wood for the trees
The chosen one of misery
You’re not the seeing hand to lead the blind
Just a victim of sorrow
And there is no
No one who follows
Believer
Why don’t you see me
Believer
Why don’t you hear me
Believer
You only see yourself
You don’t believe what you can’t see
Through the veil of conspiracy
Non-Believer
You don’t want to see the wood for the trees
The chosen one of misery
You’re not the seeing hand to lead the blind
Just a victim of sorrow
And there is no
No one who follows
Non-Believer believe me
There’s no one who follows
You don’t believe what you can’t see
Non-Believer
You don’t want to see the wood for the trees
The chosen one of misery
You’re not the seeing hand to lead the blind
Just a victim of sorrow
And there is no
No one who follows
Believer
You only trust yourself
Sip by sip
feeling the anguish fading
immersing into blur
Off the ground
drifting further to
reality’s dead sound
Dying light
lost where nothing matters
where worries are denied
The tide has not turned
and calm waters hiding
voices that will not be heard
Don’t you see me?
Can’t you hear me?
Farewell, reality
I’m falling into apathy
Everything I used to be
Is washed ashore
and I ignore
the water rising
And I’m a silhouette reminding me
Of everything I used to be
I’m washed ashore
But I ignore that I’m gone, I’m gone
Toxic sea
How I’d wish you’d be my cure
my remedy
Even though
You nearly swallow me
I’m coming back again
And again and again
You’re the death of me
but I cannot resist
Caught in a riptide
I’m pulled towards the ocean
Maybe that’s my last denial
I’m falling into apathy
Everything I used to be
Is washed ashore
and I ignore
the water rising
And I’m a silhouette reminding me
Of everything I used to be
I’m washed ashore
But I ignore that I’m gone, I’m gone
I’m drowning in calm waters
Your voice resounds as you weep
Nobody knew my sorrow
Still waters run deep
I’m drowning in calm waters
Your voice resounds as you weep
Nobody knew my sorrow
Still waters run deep
I’m drowning in calm waters
Your voice resounds as you weep
Nobody knew my sorrow
Still waters run deep
I’m falling into apathy
Everything I used to be
Is washed ashore
and I ignore
the water rising
And I’m a silhouette reminding me
Of everything I used to be
I’m washed ashore
But I ignore that I’m gone, I’m gone
Dayblind, dayblind I deny
Deny with my blinded eye
News on the tube and I’m remote – controlled by apathy
Guns disappear in the humming void my speakers guarantee
Hear the silence of my heart that’s tearing me apart
No one minds if no one cares
Surely I’ve seen all the pain in your eyes
It’s blinding me, blinding me
You’re in disguise
Dayblind, dayblind
Show me a sign and I defy
Cause I’m dayblind, dayblind I deny
Deny with my blinded eye
Late night, late night
Is singing elusive lullabies
And I’m dayblind, dayblind once again
Deny with my blinded eye
Open up your incrusted eyes
And let yourself be refined
It’s your choice not to give in
Cause no one cares if no one bares
Cause no one cares if no one bares, no
Surely I hear the silence
It deafens me
Dayblind, dayblind
Show me a sign and I defy
Cause I’m dayblind, dayblind I deny
Deny with my blinded eye
Late night, late night
Is singing elusive lullabies
And I’m dayblind, dayblind once again
Deny with my blinded eye
Surely I hear the silence
It deafens me
Hear the silence of my heart that’s tearing me apart
No one minds, no one finds, no one cares
See the emptiness inside this common state of mind
No one minds, no one finds, no one bares
Cause no one cares if no one bares, no
Dayblind, dayblind once again
Deny with my blinded eye
Wasting
Time’s ticking away
Waiting
For the end, the end of all days
This is a race for extinction
And we know the winner takes it all
So we run over the limits
With opened eyes and our heads against the wall
We cannot see the water for the flood
We’re breathless, relentless
Drain away
We’re bleeding out, breaking down
Strange to say
We’re dead in the water and wash our hands of it
Tell me how dare we
We’re bleeding out until we drain away
We’re cast away at the mercy of waves
It’s minutes to midnight but we sit and wait
The hunter, the hunted, the bird and the prey
We sink to the bottom the devil may care
We cannot see the water for the flood
We’re breathless, relentless
Drain away
We’re bleeding out, breaking down
Strange to say
We’re dead in the water and wash our hands of it
Tell me how dare we
We’re bleeding out until we drain away
We’re reckless, relentless
Drain away
This is a race for extinction
And we know the winner takes it all
So we run over the limits
With opened eyes and our heads against the wall
We’re breathless, relentless
Drain away
We’re bleeding out until we drain away
Wasting
Time’s ticking away
Waiting
For the end
Through the window in a blur
All misdoings that incurred
Disappearing light
Easier to hide
Every moment is erased
Former life degenerates
When hope dies last
When will be our turn
And we never will forget
As we never will regret
Holding heads up high
The day will come to sever ties
Finding shelter from the rain
Where drought is smothering and draining everything
I’m feeling like a savior, acting like a traitor
I’m just a goddamn prisoner
How long can we wait
Until it’s too late
No sunrise
I’m feeling like I’m living like a prisoner
Tear down the walls,
Show me the rain, show me the rain
Running from an unseen enemy
We win this fight as we hide and seek
It’s not defeat when you retreat
To prevail not surrender
Choking pockets of ember
The nightmares awake
When we’re trying to fall asleep
To prevail not surrender
Choking pockets of ember
Out of sight out of mind
Close your eyes now and fall asleep
Where drought is smothering and draining everything
I’m feeling like a savior, acting like a traitor
I’m just a goddamn prisoner
How long can we wait
Until it’s too late
No sunrise
I’m feeling like I’m living like a prisoner
To prevail not surrender
Choking pockets of ember
The nightmares awake
When we’re trying to fall asleep
To prevail not surrender
Choking pockets of ember
Out of sight out of mind
Close your eyes now and fall asleep
She’s not alright even though everyone wants her to believe
That she’s alright even though nobody can feel for her grief
She’s feeling nothing, not a teardrop running over her skin
Her breath is even, even though she knows the drama within
Why should anyone, anyone see what is wrong?
On the inside
Where does she belong, no one knows where she belongs
But it’s alright
She’s not alright even though everyone wants her to believe
She’s not ok, he’ not ok, we’re not ok at all
Blowing fuses, system overload
In self-destructive mode (I’m ok)
And I don’t know who is going to save us
We cannot remain this insecure
As we cannot delete our failure
The total shutdown
And I don’t know who is going to save us
All the violence, all the silence brought him here
Why should anyone, anyone see what is wrong?
On the inside
He’s feeling nothing, not a teardrop running over his skin
Where does he belong, no one knows where he belongs
But it’s alright
Self-destruction
Overload
She’s not ok, he’ not ok, we’re not ok at all
Blowing fuses, system overload
In self-destructive mode (I’m ok)
And I don’t know who is going to save us
We cannot remain this insecure
As we cannot delete our failure
The total shutdown
And I don’t know who is going to save us
She’s ok, he’s ok, we’re ok
Cause we accept it, regret it, reject it to start again
She’s ok, he’s ok, we’re ok
Cause we accept it, regret it, reject it to start again
Blowing fuses, system overload
In self-destructive mode (I’m ok)
And I don’t know who is going to save us
We cannot remain this insecure
As we cannot delete our failure
The total shutdown
And I don’t know who is going to save us